This post today has very little to do with teaching. Just some reflections…
You know how things rarely happen one at a time in your life? One problem? Okay, that is easy enough. But let’s see how much you can take … Life happens. And sometimes life happens really, really hard.
Let me back up a bit.
A few things are happening. Like moving, doing taxes, and getting sick.
Moving is a painful chore. First there is the joy of sorting through all of your belongings, packing them up, and staging them for hauling. Add to that scheduling moving vehicles and storage, overbearing landlords, friends who can’t help (legitimately), and the continuous processes of not having the right size boxes and losing your strapping tape.
Stressed yet? Oh hey, have you done your taxes? Show up to the tax prep place, take all of your documents… and wait for two hours. You decide to run some errands while you wait, and end up getting locked out of your car. Fun times.
Then there is illness… Getting sick as a teacher is different than in other types of jobs. In other jobs, you can call in sick, go to the doctor and get useful drugs, sit at home drink tea and binge-watch old TV shows. Maybe you need to answer a call from work.
As a teacher, you call in sick, write lesson plans for a sub, check your emails to monitor whether your students have gone crazy or if you need a new sub. Then you write more lesson plans, and answer emails. Maybe that evening you can watch some TV, but only after you have written the rubrics for your assignments, because you will have an avalanche of grading waiting for you when you get back.
Getting really sick… is scary, regardless of your profession. Your body doesn’t feel right. No matter how excellent and professional the doctors are, it is still frightening. I’m a mathematician by trade, so I understand statistics and appreciate a good explanation about relative versus absolute risk. There is no such thing as risk free. And I also know that in an individual case (like… mine), there it isn’t a 90% success chance… it will be either 0 or 100%. That is all. And still most of my brain wants to take care of my students, as well as wants to reassure my friends and loved ones that I’m fine.
So… I’m working on crisis lesson plans, as well as other contingency plans. There are parts of me that want to be reassured by my loved ones that everything will be alright, because… fuuuuu….
I want to play hooky and binge watch scary movies.
I may do that while I pack.