Midterm misanthropy: I’m not with Stupid

I wish stupidity hurt.

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.” (Sam Clemens)

To be clear, I wish I didn’t get hurt by the entitled and ignorant actions of others… I think those consequences should be limited to the perpetrators themselves. Unfortunately, their stupidity can cause grief far beyond themselves… the best the rest of us can do is try to locate a minimum safe distance from the havoc they cause.

This quarter has been a welcome respite: I have great students who seem to be taking responsibility for their own actions. Excuses have been reasonable, and (so far) extended absences have been accompanied by doctor’s notes.

Which means that most of my misanthropy has been directed at people I don’t get to fail, per se. There is a world of difference between naïve and stupid. I love teaching because I get to give information and skills to those who want it. If only I could find a way to disarm wilful ignorance and motivated reasoning outside of class, I would be fantastically happy.  Ironic that I understand why so many misguided evangelists me promise that I will go to hell as an atheist… I understand that they are engaging in a type of wish fulfillment fantasy.

I understand that my wishing it were so won’t make it happen, but I think it is fun to fantasize anyway:

  • I wish that people who honk less than 1 second after a light changes would have their car stall in that moment.
  • … or need to pay an “unnecessary honking” tax.
  • … or be afflicted by a sudden fear of car horns.
  • I have a special wish for rabid anti-vaxx folks to be bitten by a rabies infected critter.  (Dually ironic because the first treatment is get a rabies vaccine or become literally rabid).
  • … I’ll add this treatment to folks who abuse their pets… just let them know after the treatment window had closed.
  • … and for the folks who shield child abusers/rapists (yes, I’m looking at you Pope Frankie).
  • How about we castrate the self labeled “incel” bros.  Maybe less testosterone would make them less misogynistic…
  • … and lets take away their internet access.
  • … and if that doesn’t work, I’m sure they would make excellent fertilizer.

I will not kill people and wear their skins… I will not kill people and wear their skins…. I will not kill people and wear their skins….




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